Holy tacos.

Haven't written in three or more days. Kinda intense... No one reads this anyway.
I'm kinda excited to go home..not to see anyone in particular but to hide out in my room. No one has really been making me excited to see them...



Hmm. I have allot of time to think about something... Well I have been thinking about it for last three months but I have to come to an conclusion.


Dum dum dum. Haha

How am I spending my time?

Well.
Lets just say I have been thinking a lot about next year. My classes, college, Halloween etc.
I have been trying to dodge the heat and boring my self to death by it. Grandfather not doing well and best friend, extremely homesick so.. we are kinda stuck.

No way will i get started on my love life. That is a whole other blog it self- one which I would NEVER get into. I am already struggling with this, I wouldn't want to re-live it all over again.

And I am so obsessed with this show called Kristie Allies Big Life..


I think.


And I am going to strangle someone now

Photo Website UPDATE

misskitty.snappages.com

check it out and tell me what you think :)

What the....

So I am here in Sicily. Wonderful beaches, sun that shines everyday, a unique variety of people and I have a large villa in the middle of the mountains with an adorable dog.....why am I ready to jump out of my own skin? I think way to much so I freak my self out. I get overly stressed, even when I stay in a beautiful room and have a nice breeze and try to meditate with a book or what not, once I see someone else I am ready to RIP their heads off...


What the?

Why Superman

I had a mental break down last night.
It hurts when you try so hard.

I only ask for some happiness and no lies
I only ask for some love and no lies
I only ask for some passion and no lies
I only ask for surprises that are good, that makes me think what a wonderful person he is
I only ask for for your strength and to fight and tell them that I am important to you.

It sucks that I have to ask. For you would never consider it other wise.
I ask for me not to tell and for you to figure out.

You know what goes down in my head, you know allot about me. Why does it seem like you don't.
Why don't you try :(

Sub Conscious 2

I officially am in a financial crisis.
Though I just got an iPad and a New DSLR... My actual computer is in a crisis.
I need my actual computer to store all my pictures on and edit them.
The iPad was just a portable ereader and digital drawer. So I must seem so unbelievably spoiled right now, but I mean everything is technically for my next school year. I am in advanced AP art, I have allot of editing and essays. Especialy for bible lit. My iPad could be a computer but it has no space seeing how I thought this wouldn't be actual computer.

I would get a desktop....but I have to move to two houses and I am going to college soon.

I am in a rut.

-Sub Conscious

Tikatok - Kids Activities: Publish a Children's Book with Tikatok

Tikatok - Kids Activities: Publish a Children's Book with Tikatok

This website is for kids who want to make a hardcover (or soft cover) book. It seems really legit, and I think I will try it!!

For birthdays of course

Sub Conscious

"Come on Alicia you can do this. You did this well yesterday, take your fucking stand again today. Don't give up. Its not like he changed over night. He didn't. This is fucking your grounds, this is your heart that gets smashed up. Don't give in a day. He will walk all over your heart so take a fucking stand again. You can do this. It is for your own good Alicia. If you don't do this your way, this thing that you have built up over almost two years will go to waste. You can do this. Do this for yourself, for me (conscious). You are seriously going to go insane. You need to step back, while standing your grounds, and take a breather. It has to happen your way, its the only way it will work. Everything was so much better when you were the dominant one. There was stability.

                                      You can do this. Please do this." 

                                                                      -Alicia's Sub Conscious

Tonight Tonight-Smashing Pumpkins

Feeling

Had no fireworks of posts today. I think cause I am at peace right now. I have had my good share of tears, and I just feel at peace.

Nothing is ever permanent. So maybe this talking was good for a joy ride. Laymen terms: its good for now. Makes living just a bit easier when you say whats on your mind.

I say screw what the oldies say about your relationship. If you want to date the person and deal with the pains and problems. Then do it. It is not their relationship. It is not their life. You are a teenager, you are supposed to rebel a bit and stand up for what you want. Cause in the end, YOU are the one living in that body and YOU are the one that will be dying in that body. So you fight for what you love, want, need.

If you have a contract with the devil, thats another issue I will discuss at a later point :)

Requested

Yay! A good friend of mine requested that I'd do a drawing for him :) i'm excited

itll get my mind off things

oh. em. gee

I want.

I want.

I want.

I want.

and

I want.

Birthday List!!

I know, I know. I am always asking for stuff but hey, these things are like a hobby!

• Hello Kitty Fuji Instax Polaroid
• Film For The Sweet Fuji Polaroid
• Backgrounds (used for my DSLR and 35 mm)

Ok, yeah I just forgot about allot of it. whoops :)

Things

Things:

• Eyebrow Piercing
• iPad Stylus
• Disposable Cameras
• Polaroid Camera
• Wide-angle Canon Lens
• Cool Bible- For Bible Lit. Next Year
• UFO Pants

 Thats it for now.

Polaroid Cameras For Sale

Polaroid Cameras For Sale

Needs to make a list of wants and needs and money values :)

Gag.

You ever have those feelings which literally make you sick.
Makes you want to throw up your guts
All because of assuming.
I think this problem is called anxiety
And of course, try not to get hooked on pills
But nothing else will make me forget at the moment
Sometimes you need that is just to settle your clock working brain
It's unhealthy to always worry constantly
And get to point where I am feeling ligitamitley sick
Maybe you aren't supposed to do things the right way
I don't do anything else bad so I don't think it matters when that pill helps my mind relax and forget temporarily about the shit in my life

If you really knew me

....only if you really knew me

Just sometimes.

I get so angry, I could bite off my bottom lip.
Music doesn't help, makes me bite harder.
I miss the independence of anger.
Not have to freak out about my bestfriends, parents people.
I can't wait to go to college and fucking run.
Scream where no one can hear me.

Why can't I just scream. 
 Sometimes punching something isn't enough

Art for portfolio.

Not Finished

Unique Self-portrait

Unfinished urban area

Cyber Person 

Bunny

 Unfinished Scary Baby

sigh-

Home sweet.....

Even if you have the perfect house, with the perfect family

You can still feel like you have no home

and it does not have to be a physical home

its a place where

Your heart is at rest.

Your home sweet home 

is in a place where

You have finally found comfort

Your home sweet home

is in a place where

You ....

Fakes.

You know who you are...
Even though you have already prospered in life, I will not let you destroy innocent minds.

Public Apology: WANTED

Public Apology

Here is the type of man I want. No afraid to do stuff for other, in public.

Retro Housewife T-Shirts &Gifts : Retro Vintage Housewife T-Shirts | RetroBettie - StumbleUpon

Retro Housewife T-Shirts &Gifts : Retro Vintage Housewife T-Shirts | RetroBettie - StumbleUpon

OH my fucking god. I just found my favorite website!!!

I need like five of these shirts. hah

Love.

Is seriously a complex thing.

Stay true to yourself and others.

There is not a simplified definition.

Loving flaws

Being someplace though you hate it

Do anything to make other happy

Talking about how you feel

Being there when necessary

Standing up for when it means the most

Fight for what you love, for what you have

It may just slip through your fingers.

Its about risk and determination

War

seems easier than Love.

But you love the love that you have

and you will fight through every obstacle

but

in the end....

It is all worth it, because you will have that special someone you love

Right There

Are you out there?

Super Man?

Hmm.. Gifts.. I think I found one.

OOOOh

What fun!

Gifts

(This is a lame layout for the blogger site-what happened?)


I wonder. Here I am, so far away wondering if I buy things, what he would say.

I want to get presents, its my natural instincts. But I wonder if its ok to buy it for someone who wont appreciate them.

My Pet Octopus Cuff-Mod Retro Indie Clothing & Vintage Clothes - StumbleUpon

My Pet Octopus Cuff-Mod Retro Indie Clothing & Vintage Clothes - StumbleUpon

Who wants to buy for me!?!?

<3

Color Photography :: Photography Served

Color Photography :: Photography Served

I wish I was amazing like these people :(

How Twilight Works - The Oatmeal - StumbleUpon

How Twilight Works - The Oatmeal -

HAHAHAHAH

I JUST DIED

least i am not a lego:P

Over Knees &Thigh-Highs, Socks &Legwear - StumbleUpon

Over Knees &Thigh-Highs, Socks &Legwear - StumbleUpon

Yes!!!! Shit maybe I should keep this a secret.

Favorite quote of the day.

I am bigger than anything that can happen to me. All these things, sorrow, misfortune, and suffering, are outside my door. I am in the house and I have the key.

Charles Fletcher Lummis

11-21 Habits of Happy People

11. Invest in Relationships

Always make sure your loved ones know you love them even in times of conflict. Nurture and grow your relationships with your family and friends by making the time to spend with them. Don’t break your promises to them. Be supportive.


Now how can you do this. You stick by there side for everything. You have tried to keep your calm. You have dealt with almost everything they have thrown at you. But them selves can't keep promises. Them selves can't give what you gave in return. Themselves get angry if you blow up at them after dealing with everything before. What happened to the people who appreciated others, who gave gratitude, how fought for their independence-who knows when you are being serious and staying true to them.


Yes I am talking personally. I think why I try so hard to keep promises made with him is because I would never want to end up like him. Though I get hurt, I will be the one that prospers in life-because I know how to keep a promise. I trust my self. I have pushed mountains, swam seas, caught stars for this person... The least I can get is some everyday love.


Because I have made a promise to my self that it will only be one person at a time, and I invested allot in this so called relationship and I do not get nothing in return..




There the question stand up: What are you still doing there with him.




My answer:  if I don't show this kid love, purity..the fucking true world not the look over there I am pampered. If I let this go, this guy will venture out in the world with either his parents holding his hand or a complete mess. Love makes you do crazy things. Its the worst for of Self Injury.








Number 12-21:


12. Keep Their Word

Honesty is the best policy. Every action and decision you make should be based on honesty. Be honest with yourself and with your loved ones.


*slaps face.

Vitamins.

I was recently talking about a friend with my uncle. I talked about how he never eats healthy and takes vitamins and has to eat about 3000 calories a day. I said it was fine that he ate like crap, because he has a high metabolism and takes vitamins.

My uncle looked at me and laughed. He said that what my friend was taking, was like a time bomb. It was like mixing all the vitamins into one thing. for example, lets say u do not want to eat for the rest of your day, so u take a blender-mix in your breakfast,lunch,snack and dinner into one.... It just doesn't cut it.

He said even though the vitamins get absorbed into your body more quickly it still will end up hurting your body in the future. My friend may be healthy now, but when he grows older-it wont matter how low is BMI is, because he will have skipped out on all the natural vitamins that take 4 hours to absorb. Leading him to be sick.

Another con to that is your body might just not accept that vitamin anymore. Its like taking an advil a day.. Sooner or later, when you are in actual pain 1 advil wont cut it.

I would tell my friend this, but he is stubborn and well doesn't intake things well as the body does with the vitamins.

:)

UGH...

How do I describe this....

maybe in a motion of holding my stomach, liquid coming out of my mouth, add a couple sound effects...


Yup I feel officially sick.

35mm Cameras, Lenses & Accessories - Buy & Sell New & Used Cameras - KEH.com

35mm Cameras, Lenses & Accessories - Buy & Sell New & Used Cameras - KEH.com

I think I fell in love.

Course I have my film and my Canon DSLR. But hey, different cameras, different results. I should get a bit spoiled right now. I just got this new camera that I should be paying off, but a hobby is a hobby.

I Party Till I Pass Out And I Fuck Till I Bleed

I Party Till I Pass Out And I Fuck Till I Bleed

Oh my god. You are 11. Get over your self. You call the cyber police then you say "Love me I am Famous!".

Here is the thing sweetheart. Your parents are not taking good care of you. You are literally the definition of a white trash bitch. You made a video of you crying and your father freaks out... you could of prevented this but instead you were being immature and decided to get more attention. I seriously cannot see how anyone would want to be your friend. For being as ignorant as you I am surprised you haven't gotten your ass whooped.

I am also serious about your parents being bad parents. Your blog title is "I fuck till I bleed".... you are 11. Shit. When you are older maybe it is more acceptable but talking about your sex toys. If I was your parent I would feel so ashamed and disgusted how this excuse for a daughter came out of me. You need some discipline, some rules-a fucking dictionary at the very least. I would of sent you to boot camp or like Jesus camp.

Sweetie ( I wont call you anything more than that, since in fact you are not even a teenager yet)

You would do well without the internet for a year. Maybe some duct tape and maybe the Super Nanny as a side order. Please.. make this world less horrible. You are just polluting it even more.

X to the fucking O

Dammit Doll - DIY Craft Project Instructions

Dammit Doll - DIY Craft Project Instructions

Shall Do.

Dammit Dammit Dammit

Magnetic Whiteboard | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Magnetic Whiteboard | Flickr - Photo Sharing!

Next Room Idea???

Cream Cheese Crescent Rolls | Recipe | Cut Out Keep

Cream Cheese Crescent Rolls | Recipe | Cut Out Keep

Look at the pictures, doesn't it make your mouth

WATER?

Hanging, ornate, and scluptured designs

Hanging, ornate, and scluptured designs

Amazing..Will buy some once I am sure I want to stretch my ears. I wouldn't go higher than a 8 or6

Secret.

Is is so wrong of me to like Jersey Shore again?


shhhhh

To Dream or Not to Dream.

Ever have one of those dreams that makes your life look perfect.
I have had two of those last night and it is like torture.
The perfection, the love.
Fine. I get it, you can't find happiness in someone else.
But they could aid you with it.
After dealing with these people in real life, you make up these new people.
A gentleman.
 Are there any left in this world?

Art Supplies!

Today the weather was unpredictable.

Rain

Hail

Thunder

Lightning

Sun

It is Italy for crying out loud.

Lucky for me I got a new box of crayons.

And I have every color to describe my weather in Italy :

 Crayon Weather:

      Sky Blue

      Timber Wolf

      Periwinkle

      Melon

      Gray

      Cerulean

:)

Dexter.

Having trouble to kill?
Murdering the innocent
Saving the guilty.

The Trinity Killer
Got my attention

Sleep

True
Do not go to sleep sad.
Do what ever you can to fix what happened
try it. fake it. want it.
If you want a good nights sleep.
Never go to sleep with regrets




Wake up in the morning happy.
Open windows.
Take a breath.
Be happy, its not worth it to sleep on a bad note.
Slip some good notes into your ears.

This will make your life more lively.




tip from me

Strange Pinches.

Tattoos preserved in formaldehyde

Pirates. 

Peircings.

What?!
That is the first thing parents say.
Before knowing what, where, when and why?
I am who I am and let me grow.
Let me expand.
                         A piercing.


These pieces of metal can be a way to express yourself,
to be artistic, to show off...
for me.. lets be realistic.
Empty space
      Thats what it is for me. No balance. I have a need to balance this all out.
Lets go and get some!

True Love.

Love poems

Pain.Recovery.Forgiveness.

In Italy broken hearts manage to write their story

 and plaster it to the wall

Let Us Realize.

The new generation hand in hand with the new civilization. You don't know everything. You simply can not come to me say all my flaws and their solutions. Life changes everyday, you can not tell. Suggest.

You are young. You catch what ever life brings your way. You are stubborn yet wise. You want to live free. You wear your heart on your sleeve. You are living in your body. You get advice....You die for your self.